Today was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, it was warm enough to go coatless and the city seemed to be enveloped in one large serene smile. It was a day that made me long for summer.

Today I faced suburbia for the first time with open eyes. There it was, in front of me, all around me: beautiful homes with manicured lawns, streets wide enough for parents to feel safe with their kids riding their bikes, even sidewalks filled with joggers, backyards with fruit trees and wide decks, basketball hoops at the end of cul-de-sacs. The beautiful neighborhoods were just down the street from great schools and decent daycare. Parks with strangely immaculate playgrounds were everywhere. People seemed to be smiling. I even saw a few non-Caucasions :)

Today, with the sunroof open, maps and Sunday paper in hand, Boo sleeping in his car seat, we set forth to venture to new neighborhoods in search of a new house. This is a weekend ritual we've done before in weekends past, but today was different. Today, today, today - I realized that I need to set aside my pride, my reliance on delivered dinners on lazy nights, my stupid ego, and really put Boo's needs first.

We need a bigger house. We need a better house. We need a house with a big carpeted room for Boo to roam about and throw his toys at will. We need a house in a neighborhood with wide, well-lit streets and nice, even sidewalks everywhere. We need a house built in an era that understood the need for real closets and adequate storage space throughout. We need a house in a good school district. We need a house for Boo. Our house, as beautiful as it is, as roomy as it is for A and I and the two dogs, as perfect as it is for a house in the city - it is not the right house for us plus two dogs plus Boo.

Today I saw where our future needs to be, and I realize it's probably not in the city anymore. And today, for the first time, I am ok with that. We went to an open house for a gorgeous home - 3bd, 3 ba, office with french doors, bonus room, 3 car garage, formal dining room, living room, family room, gourmet kitchen, large master bath with large walk-in closet, utility room, huge deck, large fenced yard with fruit trees and well-maintained lawn. The neighborhood was perfect. The house was about 20 minutes out of the city with just a tad bit of traffic.

If we wanted the same kind of house in the city, we would have to pay $100-$200,000 more that what this house cost. It's insane! And the neighborhood would not be so nice. And the schools would not be as good. And the house would not be in as good of shape.

Today reality bit me in the ass and made me realize my need to find a house in the city is ridiculous, and purely selfish. It's like the Sex in the City episode where Miranda finally agrees to see a house in Brooklyn though she swears she'll never leave Manhattan. But she does. And so may we.

Who knows - we may end up finding the perfect house in the city. But in the event that we do not, I think I've finally made peace with the idea of packing it up and heading to suburbia. Man, the times, they are a changing.


betty said...

My DH and I have been struggling with the very same issues. It's such a hard decision to make.

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