Sacrifices suck

I've been crying for the past few minutes. I hate it, and I don't want to write about, but I feel like I have to because I don't want to talk about it and I certainly can't sit around wallowing by myself. So come along, join me in my sad pity party.

My husband and I have been struggling for the past few months with our youngest dog, Mac. We got her when she was just a wee pup of two months. Now she is almost three years old, which is so hard to believe. She's adorable, so loving, amazingly sweet and fun and hyper and full of boundless energy. She is also quite the handful. She barks. A lot. We've tried all of the non-bark-collar training methods to curb inappropriate barking to no avail. She jumps on people and invades their space to the point of absurdity. We tried those training methods too to curb the jumping, again, to no avail. She's a submissive dog so she pees a little when a guy walks into the house. Not fun for anyone. She has also recently started being aggressive toward our older dog, Thor. Thor is awesome. Sweet, gentle, we can trust him not to run off and if he does we know he'll come back, he only barks if he hears strange noises (which is a good thing we think), and he's pretty easy to take care of. But raising two big dogs and one energetic baby... Let's face it: we just don't have the time or the energy to give Mac the kind of attention she so deserves. She needs someone who is single, or who has no kids or older kids, or who doesn't have any other dogs. She needs someone who will take her running and spend a lot of time playing with her. We just don't have that time anymore.

So we have agreed, after many talks and having to deal with many Mac "situations," that it is best for everyone if we give Mac up for adoption. I hate writing this I hate writing this I hate it I hate it, but there it is in its ugly honesty. We can't be the parents for our sweet dog that she needs us to be. We've failed as parents to her. We suck. But we admit it. It sucks to own up to it, but there it is. We suck. This sucks. This is the suckiest thing we've had to go through in a long time. My stomach is killing me. I just feel like crying, but writing has helped. I know we have to do this, for her especially. We have to do this for us too. Our lives are crazy busy already as is, and we'd like some sanity. We're going crazy trying to provide for her and it's all because when it comes down to it, we can't.

Mac was so good with Boo. We were surprised how good she was with him, given that she's such a hyper, high maintenance pooch. She's really rather gentle with our baby Boo. We have tons of pictures of the two of them. Boo will ask us someday about this cute dog in the photos that he never really knew, and we'll have to tell him. We wanted to give her a better life, a life that she deserved and we couldn't give. We tried and we tried and we loved her with all that we were, we loved her so much it hurt terribly to say goodbye, but we loved her so much that we had to.


Jenny said...

Wow, that is a really tough decision. We have a jumper and excited peeing dog, and it's a constant battle to keep her happy. Wishing you peace with this, and hoping the perfect family appears soon.

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Lady Calliah said...

Hi - I'm new to your blog and am so sorry to hear of your difficulties. Ultimately, though, the baby comes first and you've got your hands full with being a new mom. Give yourself a break - they don't come often! Giving the pup a loving place to live is much better than living with the stress. *hugs*

Best wishes,

Lady Calliah

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