Getting through

When something terrible happens, I am never sure quite what to do or how to act. It is as if everyone around you has a time frame for how long they think it should take you to deal with a situation and you are supposed to live in that time frame. But I can't. Everything is fluid. I'm up and I'm down. My husband and I took a day off of work and then got back into the swing of things, or at least tried to. I am still trying to. I go through bouts of manic happiness and then swing around to minutes of staring into emptiness and suddenly feeling the urge to bawl my eyes out. I thought I would blog about it, but then yesterday I felt A-OK and thought it would be silly to trouble the rest of the world with my pain. But today. Then there's today. Today is grey and cold and empty. Today I have a meeting and a hectic afternoon of running around and I am afraid that I won't be able to do it, any of it. So here I sit. Typing away. Trying to find some solace in this cryptic message to strangers. Writing has always helped. It is my therapy. But it's not helping me today.

Someday I will write about the unspeakable sadness in detail because I really do think it needs to be written about, talked about, shared and understood.

But today. Today you get a cryptic message from a woman who is just trying to get through the day without crying. Today you just get me, raw, exposed, but still private. I'm sure tomorrow I will blog about the randomness of daily life, like Boo's new love of Cookie Monster or my sudden obsession to clean everything in the house. But this is today. I'm just trying to get through.



This is Spring? Where is the sunshine? The crisp Spring air on a sunny dry day? Where are the birds chirping and flowers blooming?

Tomorrow is our big event. I'm super stoked. And a wee bit scared. I know I am forgetting something, but what? Alas, the fact that I bought a brand new beautiful Spring dress and Spring green heels for the event should make everything A-OK. Right? Right.

Boo is in love. With many creatures, big and small. Especially Lion, Zebra, Hippo and Giraffe. Hey, those are the same animals that play the main characters in the movie Madagascar! Coincidence? I think not. He's watched the movie a million times now, or at least parts of it. He loves to sing the Move It, Move It song. He brings out all of the animals in one of his jungle animal play sets, lays them all on their sides, and then proceeds to say "goodnight, lion!" "goodnight, zebra!" until he's said goodnight to all of them. He also likes to pretend to feed his animal friends, in particular Big Bird. He asks him, "Juice, Big Bird?" and apparently Big Bird says "Yes, sure! Thanks Boo!" because he then gives Big Bird some juice. Or milk. Or a snack.

Now that he's getting over his cold, he is eating better too. Thank goodness. The boy loves his strawberries and blueberries. Poor peas- they were once In, and now they are Out. Must be sooo Last Season.

What is it with the colds this year? It seems like everyone I know has been sick and for long periods of time, too. I got hit with it and am just starting to feel better tonight.

A new episode of Lost is on tonight. Woohoo!


Insert Witty Title Here

Holy crap! I haven't blogged in five days! I'm super crazy insane freaky busy right now. Boo is sick but in the recovery stage. It's mainly just snot now and a little rash on his cute little face from rubbing away the snot. Still high spirits, still our Boo, except he's not eating as much. Well, except for blueberries, which he just loves.

I know that some folks who read this blog are totally sick of me talking about this, but really, I can't believe his vocabulary progress at this stage! It's such a crazy age! Now he's actually singing all of the words to songs and he'll pull these crazy sentences out of nowhere. Ay carumba. It's too much! So awesome.

I may not post for a while. Big event coming up that I'm working a million hours for on top of my other current jobs and taking care of new an potential clients. It's crazy mad fun and I hope people will understand that with what little spare time I will have, I'd rather spend it with my fabulous family than blogging :) ... watch, now I'll blog everyday. Or not!


Random snow storm

We have snow. Sticking. In mid-March. What's up with that? We hardly ever have snow here, let alone this late in the year. Boo LOVES the snow. He held onto his snow inside until it melted in his cold little hands.


Boo man talking, Elmo peeing & the jungle party

Boo is a little man now. He's talking up a storm. Like, really talking. Sure sometimes you have to listen really closely to get that he's saying "time to go, go get two shoes, put on my coat, let's go now, bye bye doggie!" but hubby and I understand him and it's freaking me out. Does this mean he's going to start talking back to us soon? Right now his little sentences are all fun, happy sentences. I'll live in this happy dreamworld perfect kid bubble for a little bit before it bursts into tantrum world, if you don't mind. :)

Boo has been especially attached to his stuffed pals lately. Little Elmo and Doggie are his favorites, but sometimes he tackles bear with a hug (huh, bear hug, funny) and lets Mr Little Duck play with the others. Today he decided that Elmo was going pee pee. He kept pointing to where Elmo would have a penis (do Elmos have penises?) and saying "pee pee. Elmo pee pee." So I asked him if he wanted to take Elmo to his potty, and he did. He set Elmo right in there and said "Elmo pee pee!" and then he proceeded to sit on Elmo since apparently HE was actually going pee pee. I had to kindly explain that we don't pee on our friends (unless they are bitten by jellyfish a la an episode of Friends), so he took Elmo out of the potty. And then put Doggie in the potty. And then sat on Doggie. This potty training stuff can be pretty amusing.

So hubby and I have decided to have a jungle theme, since Boo is in love with the first full-feature movie he has ever seen (and the only so far): Madagascar. I'm psyched. Monkeys everywhere. Bananas for everyone. Lions hiding in the bushes. A watering hole (aka his kiddie pool) within the jungle. So freakin excited. I also think my husband picked this theme because he secretly wants it for his birthday, which is just a few days before Boo's birthday. The invitations are going to be banana bunches. I'm making a CD with jungle music and ambient noise to rock our surround sound. Of course, this is all in my head. We'll see how much actually happens.



Jon Stewart is hosting the Oscars right now! Love it.
Or, as my son pronounces "Oscar"--OSCEEE!!! Boo thinks John Stewart is funny.