It Takes A Village to Raise a Marriage

Me & hubby in Zurich, 1999...you know, when we were young.

Fifteen years ago today, the morning of November 18, 1993, a relationship was born into a village that has grown into an amazing community of friends, strangers, family, kids. In the beginning there were people like Matt, Jen, Bill, Cindy, Julie, Fred, Ian, Dave, Whitney, Andrea (A1). Throughout the years people like Andrea (A2), Amy, Heather, Kelly, Graham, Jim, and Scott moved in. And then there were more. Families combined, strangers became friends, friends became partners, co-workers became confidants, and all became our family whom we love fiercely. The village keeps growing, and as it grows, our relationship gets stronger.

Today is the 15th anniversary of my relationship with my husband, whom we'll call Cha Cha. It is not our wedding anniversary, but rather the anniversary of when our lives first started together. Don't get me wrong: I loved our wedding! It was a fantastic weekend full of fist fights, a night in the ER, and wedding crashers in Hawaiian shirts who bought us shots. There was laughter, dancing, many a long rambling toast, and lots of love all around. But that is not when our story started. To only celebrate the day we got married is an insult to our relationship. To discount the 8 years prior to being husband and wife is to dismiss the sweetest and hardest journey. And so I like to celebrate this anniversary which, in truth, is the anniversary of not just me and Cha Cha, but of me and him... and all of the lovely people who have seen us through all of the highs and lows.

I love, adore, cherish my husband. He is crazy fun and brilliant. He knows more about everything than I can ever imagine to know, and I still don't know how he can remember the names of all the random generals in this war or that (and yet somehow forget weekend plans I had told him about three times...but that's for another post!). He is a witty, talented smart ass who makes me laugh every day. He is amazingly sweet, silly and absolutely over-the-moon in love with our kids. And incredibly, he loves me. Still. He supports my many crazy ideas and causes, puts up with my constant singing, dancing and general loud silliness, and appreciates my weird quirks and annoying habits. He believed in us, when I didn't. And through it all, our friends and family believed.

We love each other to the moon and back, but our relationship is truly strengthened by the other people in our lives whom we love beyond words. We owe so much of our relationship to our parents, our siblings and their spouses (I just want to take this time to shout I LOVE MY IN-LAWS!! Totally lucked out with how awesome they all are). We owe our cousins, co-workers and dear life-long friends. Our memories of our relationship are nothing without all of them. The people who not only helped raise our marriage, but are also now helping to raise our kids. The fact that our kids will grow up knowing so much love, never having a reason to doubt they are supported, and being able to grow up with the strength of such a community...it is all we as parents could ask for.

So on this anniversary of the beginning of our relationship, I take the time to thank those who have been there from the beginning, those who have joined our lives in recent years, and those who have just entered or re-entered our circle. If our marriage will always be as strong as our foundation of friends and family, then we surely will have many more anniversaries to celebrate.

PS. And Cha Cha, if you're reading this, which you probably aren't because you got bored with my rambling after the second paragraph and it's all the same blah blah blah you hear from my nonstop chatter... I love you, man. Here's to another 15. Holy shit we'll really be old by then.


Cathy said...

Happy Anniversary!!!

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Kelly said...

Happy love anniversary! I love that you keep track. I also appreciate being in your circle cause witnessing a partnership that works as well as yours does with Cha-Cha... it is truly inspirational. Congratulations!

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keeper of the chocolates said...

i love this post! how true....you have inspired me to begin the annual celebration of our 'beginning'. loving your blog. so happy i found you :)

hugs from your late night twitter bud,

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keeper of the chocolates said...

ps, i am 'shopMarigold' on twitter :)

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marlynn said...

thanks for the comments ladies! Shelbi, nice to see you here too! I enjoy your Twitter tweets! :)

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